Last week my sister and I took in Titanic in 3D, and it was...well, it wasn't what I thought it would be. I remember going to see it like, 4 or 5 times in the theater when it came out. It (and LEO!, as we generally called him in those days) drove me and my adolescent self completely nutso. I still watch it every time it's on TV (until my husband comes in to the room at least...he can't stand it, like any other normal adult male so I automatically change it and hide my shame). The first thing I thought when they were re-releasing it was that I couldn't wait to go see it in the theaters again!
But let me just pause a minute to say that though I love terrible, awful, no-good very bad movies, I generally steer clear of 3D. Remember Jaws 3? It was by far the worst of the whole bunch, and 3D movies have only gotten worse since then (although I admit that I wanted to see Shark Night 3D when it came out. I'm a sucker for the shark flicks!). But I thought, oh, it's Titanic, it'll just be a cutesy little love story in 3D. I forgot about, you know, all of the graphic ship sinking parts, I guess. I forgot about the people falling off the boat and hitting the propellers on the way down. I forgot about the frozen lady and baby. Maybe if I had remembered, I would have skipped it. It seemed, to me, in my semi-older age, like kind of a snuff film. Plus my prego-lady hormones made me sob throughout the entire thing, especially when that Irish lady knows that she's going to die and tucks her kids in and tells them a story anyway. I'm almost sobbing again now.
Another part of me is super mad at old lady Rose in the end for throwing that diamond over the edge. That poor man will probably lose his grants and all of his funding and his research will be mocked in the scientific community and his career will be over. She could have just handed him the stupid thing. She dies that night anyway! Why not hand it over and save that poor man's professional life? I can see him a year after that voyage with a gun in his mouth. It makes me feel terrible and like old lady Rose like a ton less.
But I guess what I mean to say is that if we're going to start re-making movies from the late 90's in 3D, we start with the really important, timeless and socially relevant ones. The most important one I can think of, of course, is Spice World. They would of course need to re-make those awesome ice cream-flavored Chupa Chups lollipops with the Spice Girl wrappers too as promotional tie-ins. Think about that.