make yourself useful and...

 

host a cookie exchange.
it's not only useful, it's totally awesome. plus its an easy excuse for holiday mingling. all you need is a clean-ish house, some appetizers and maybe a few (possibly adult) beverages. it's like a cocktail party with a purpose. that purpose is making sure you have a ton of different kinds of cookies for platters that you can use at work parties, family get-togethers or as last-minute or hostess gifts. oh, and everyone loves cookies, especially homemade cookies. seriously. go ahead and try to prove me wrong.
i promise that this is one of the easiest holiday parties you'll ever give (the only hard part is making the cookies. but you can do that beforehand). here's how:
first, pick a few friends, family members, co-workers, or other people that you at least kind of like. every year, my mom and my sis and i get together with a the ladies of a family we've known forever. one is stenni's Godmother, her mom is my sister's Godmother, and her sister and daughter are also friends that we consider family but don't get to see nearly often enough. so it's us, the same core every year. 7 of us in total, so each of us makes 7 dozen cookies so that we can share a dozen of each kind and keep a dozen for ourselves.
then, invite them to your house at a time you know they're available. don't wait until Christmas eve, or a busy weekend evening. pick a "school night" so it's easier for everyone to schedule, and hold the party around 7, after dinner.
then pick a cookie recipe and cute packaging. i usually make a drop cookie or a spritz, something easy. i learned my lesson after i made 7 dozen cream-filled florentine lace cookies one year. while it might be a time to let your baking prowess shine, it's also time to be realistic. it's the holidays. everyone's busy. don't go the florentine lace route. there's nothing worse than getting frustrated, because then it becomes a chore instead of a joy. then bake the cookies and package them nicely, so that they can be given out as a gift.
lastly, put out the snacks and wait for everyone to come over. remember, this does not have to be formal, and in fact it's better if it's pretty casual. you don't even need any kind of activities (our group actually does Christmas trivia sometimes, but it's not competitive or anything, and if we're in the middle of something, we don't bother). the most important activity is distributing the delicious cookies! this time of year everyone's overdoing everything. you want yours to be the one get together that everyone enjoys because they don't feel rushed or pressured.
so that's it. remember, the party can be short, as in 2 hours or so. we're all tired this time of year. don't push anything. but maybe you'll want to linger with friends around a cup of coffee, and that's alright too. there are no hard and fast rules for hosting a cookie exchange, except that you have to exchange cookies. that's it. do what comes naturally.
looking into the future: my next cookie exchange will take place in the middle of December. I'm not actually hosting this year, so I can use a little more energy on baking! in the past i've done the aforementioned florentine lace cookies as well as some classic oatmeal raisins, snickerdoodles, and some miniature chocolate whoopie pies, among others. some of the other ladies have made pignioli cookies, mint chocolate chip cookies, macaroons, double chocolate cookies, and even oreos wrapped inside chocolate chip cookie dough! it's getting harder and harder to pick my cookie recipe every year, but i've narrowed it down to  zimtsterne (German cinnamon stars), pfeffernusse (German spice cookies), or maybe even gingersnaps. what do you think? have you ever hosted or attended a cookie exchange?

hubs' birthday, or Tedtoberfest...

will be held this saturday evening at my house.

so what does this mean? well, i know he gets father's day as a reward for being such a terrific dad, and on our anniversary we reward each other for being awesome spouses to one another (i assume. i'm always awesome, but i can't imagine i'm always the best spouse). but the most fun husband-related day? his birthday, because we get to just celebrate him. so i want it to be as fun and super-rockin as possible. this year i am throwing what i've tentatively termed "tedtoberfest" and we will be doing all sorts of fun oktoberfest stuff like playing drinking games and masskrugstemmen (go ahead and check it out. i didn't know what it was until a few weeks ago either!) and pretzel-making and whatnot. and possibly listening to oompah music. i think i'll have to throw that in there if i can. it just seems like such fun and make sme wish i owned a tuba.
i will also be making him his favorite birthday treat: a funfetti cake with pink strawberry icing. yeah, a pink cake, for serious. this is a strapping young bearded luimberjack-looking man. he will be eating a pink cake and loving it. i love it too. 
when hubs was a kid, they didn't really throw birthday parties after you turned like 5 or something. but then again they also didn't go on vacation. proof positive that in-laws are totally insane and live what are possibly joyless lives. but that means that a party is always something exciting and fun for him, whereas in my family, it was kind of expected and not quite as awesome. when i threw his his first surprise party a few years ago, he was totally shocked and didn't suspect anything at all. now around his birthday he always kind of looks at me sideways because, he explained, if i got away with throwing an elaborate destination surprise party without arousing his suspicion at all, what else could i be doing that he doesn't know about? (nothing exciting, really)
anyway i'm really excited to throw this party for him. anyone got any good german party food recipes? i'll be trying my hand at sauerbraten for the first time, but if that doesn't work, we'll still have bbq chicken, ribs, handrolled pretzels, german sausage and plenty of beer!

confessions of a casual hostess

i host most of the holidays for my family and friends, including but not limited to:

• Easter
• cinco de mayo
• everyone's birthdays
• baseball opening day (yeah, it's a holiday in my house)
• occasionally halloween
• thanksgiving
• Christmas/Hanukkah/holiday/new year's party, which is never to fall on any of those occasions
  
• an assortment of half-holidays (like half St. patrick's day...oh, you don't celebrate half st. patty's? shame on you!)
  

for memorial day, the 4th of july, veteran's day and Christmas, we usually go away, and Christmas morning brunch is usually a group effort at my folks' house. i like it better sometimes (especially on Christmas) when i don't have to deal with all of the hassle of cleaning and preparing and i can enjoy the company of everyone...plus around Christmastime everyone is throwing parties, and i don't want mine to be another imposition or stop on a long tour of stops throughout the day. that's just not how i roll. i like sitting on the deck singing and chatting until the wee hours of the morning. i enjoy playing dominoes for hours. i really think it's great when people go for seconds and thirds of all of the food that is prepared either ahead of time or throughout the evening. but there are things i don't like about entertaining too, and other things that i do very badly. sometimes i even do things that are definite no-no's for people who actually entertain on a regular basis.
here are some examples:

• i hate "tablescapes." i hate the word "tablescape." i'm all for minor decorating (i usually do for cinco de mayo and hubs is all about Christmas lights), but to go all out and then have all of the pretty, impractical things in the way of the food and drink? no way. not happening. maybe a centerpiece, depending on the occasion, and a tablecloth with matching napkins. and some candles, if you're lucky. the food should be pretty enough to be its own decoration.
• every meal i host is a buffet. i am not sitting you down and serving you. i made everything, but that doesn't necessarily mean that everyone loves every single thing (though they should). so i'm not going to put it on your plate and have you hate it. i like when people pick. so what if at Easter you just want ham and liquor, much like my brother-in-law? that's fine by me. but i'm not going to make a plate for you with everything on it, or serve you in courses, when i don't always know your preferences.
• my bbq's usually involve meat and only meat. no sides, no salads, nothing like that. occasionally we'll roast some onions, peppers, asparagus, and pineapple, for use on burgers and sausage. once or twice i grilled peaches, but i think i was the only one who ate them. i learned to do this through trial and error. i used to host a bbq with the hubs every friday. at first we made all kinds of stuff: pasta salad, cole slaw, desserts, you get the idea. but when everyone saw the ribs, chicken drumsticks, hot dogs and giant burgers, no one touched anything else. if we want to serve food that isn't meat, we call it something else, but not a bbq.
• i only sometimes plan activities, and they are not always entirely appropriate to the occasion. sometimes we'll have a pinata for cinco de mayo, and sometimes we will make a gingerbread house for Christmas. i've even been known to play board games on game night. but other times, we are making leftover gingerbread houses in the middle of the summer or having snowshoe bbq's or making snowcones in january or churros for a going-away party. i like to mix it up and base activities off what's fun, what's handy, who's around and how much we've had to drink.
• rain does not necessarily cancel an outdoor party. i come from a family of roofers. we can tarp off anything. some of the best parties i've had have been outside in the pouring rain under a tarp city. doesn't do much for ambiance, but you won't forget it.
• sometimes i leave in the middle of my own parties for a bit. like to take the dog for a walk. or to go to sleep if it's super late and hubs still seems to be feeling froggy. this only happens at "friends" parties, not "family" ones. friends are more understanding when i randomly disappear.
• with the exception of holiday dinners (at which time everyone is incredibly prompt with fork in hand at the specified time), i usually tell people that the party begins an hour or two before it really does. why? because my friends usually fun at least an hour or two late for no discernible reason, even the ones who live down the block.
  

my point is, you don't have to be a great hostess. you just have to try. i haven't always been the best. hey, i'm not the best now. but i like to make people feel comfortable in my home, not like if they reach for the butter they'll mess up the tablescape. good food and good company are usually about all you need for folks to have a good time.