How did you decide whether or not to homeschool your oldest child?

I'm at a crossroads: the memo came home from Stenni's preschool the other day, an official-looking memo about kindergarten sign-ups, complete with requests for vaccination records, birth certificates, sign-up dates and places in alphabetical order by last name, and all that jazz. Sign-ups are in less than a month. I still don't know if I want to send her to public school or not. I like the idea of homeschooling, but I don't know if I'm capable or organized (OR PATIENT) enough to really teach her everything she needs to know at home. I worry about her attention span. I worry that she won't listen to me. By all accounts, she is well-behaved at both school and Sunday school, but of course she's different at home with mom, which isn't to say that she's a terror or anything but we are both very strong willed and have been known to butt heads occasionally. So would she listen to me as a teacher or view me as an adversary? Who knows.
I'm not worried about socialization. For what we were paying for her preschool, I can send her to tumbling/dance once a week, plus all of the free events at the library and camp and VBS in the summer. But I'm really concerned that she will think that school at home is not serious enough and that I'll end up super frustrated. Also: I went to public school up til college. It wasn't super great for me, but I'm ok I guess, and nothing truly traumatic happened because of the school system. I'm not cool with common core or all of the testing, and I think it's a breeding ground for mediocrity because of the trend to teach toward the middle. Which is not the teachers' fault, they are only doing the best with the resources that they have, which are few and far between since people basically demonize them for the public. And to be honest Stenni is much more outgoing than I am, and infinitely better at making friends and making the best of a situation. She might just blossom in the school setting. Would it really be more for me than for her?
I imagine that a lot of moms have had these (and tons of other) issues in the past, so I could really use the wisdom of the world here. What was the deciding factor, or was it a more pros and cons thing? I know that some people feel super strongly one way or the other but really? I don't. I just really don't  know what would be better in the long run.
So other moms of the interwebs: How did you decide to homeschool (or not)? What were the deciding factors? Anybody else flying by the seat of their pants?
For our family, homeschooling isn't a religious thing, it's more that I feel like the classroom in general is more likely to kill creativity than nurture it, and might eventually squeeze all of the natural love of learning out of my Stenni. And that would be a tragedy, but of course it is also still a hypothetical at this point.
Can anybody offer any insight? Any great resources out there? Help!

Post-Baby Menu Planning...Help!

Stenni talks and sings to Cuatro in my belly all the time. It's adorable, but unsettling how small her head is compared to my giant belly.

Guys, this baby is coming in like, 6 weeks, doctor's count (I'm guessing more like 4-5). I'm like so not prepared. I mean, I have some clothes and whatnot (I still have to wash them though...that's on the to-do list for today), most of my baby gear is slowly coming out of storage, and things are kind of falling into place. But the other important stuff like putting in the carseat (let alone cleaning out the car so I can fit it in there), pre-registering with the hospital, packing the hospital bag, you know, the stuff that you don't want to leave until last minute? Yeah, forget it, I am woefully behind. And things that are urgent and also necessary for living, like putting in the new crib and making a few healthy meals for our family for the hectic first few days (or weeks...maybe months?), have absolutely not even been started. It borders on pathetic how unprepared I am this time around.

Which brings me to my next point: Next week I'll be doing a few posts on freezable meals and snacks that I can prepare now, stick in the freezer and grab after Cuatro gets here when pizza and beer just won't do/when I want to pretend that I'm trying to be healthy. Anyone have any suggestions? Point me in any helpful direction you can in the comments. Thanks!

Also on my to-do list for today: make and freeze chocolate chip cookie dough. Because when it comes to necessities, you need to know what you really can't live without.

Just what in the world do pregnant women wear for special occasions?

As much as I love Target and Old Navy (and trust me, I do), I'm wondering exactly where pregnant women on a budget shop for special occasion dresses? I have half a closet full of "work-appropriate" (business to business-casual wear and suit separates) maternity wear from when I used to occasionally venture out into the real world. The other half is full of sloppy/stretchy jersey maxi skirts, hoodie tie-tops, and pajama-type items that I attempt to pass off as real maternity clothes (most of which were purchased at Old Navy and Target, since their clothes are inexpensive but don't necessarily stand the test of time super-well). This only sometimes works. 
But here's my issue: I'm about to pop and start looking super-huge, which happens for me at 18-20 weeks (I'm already in that chubby, kind of gross, probably would ask if I'm pregnant or ate too many hot dogs phase). I have a wedding to attend in the beginning of July, somewhere in the 22-23 week range. I have to look amazing, spectacular, and breathtaking, obviously. I have only one formal-ish maternity dress that I wore to hubby's award ceremony last pregnancy, but it's won't fit right for when I need it (I won't be as huge-ish at this point as I was for that particular occasion), and it might be a little too casual. So I've been scouring the internets for anything acceptable and in my price range only to come up pathetically empty-handed. So what's a knocked-up broad to do?
My usual go-to places for formal attire are sadly bereft of any maternity-wear. I generally stick with Dress Barn (even though the name sounds awful, they are really great and have a wonderful selection) or eShakti (great, but I'm not ordering something custom for an ever-changing preggers body), and neither of those seem to be options this time around. I've even thought of buying something non-maternity that would fit, like something empire-waisted and flowy, but think that may just look, well, strange and cheapie. 
Stores/sites like Motherhood Maternity, A Pea in the Pod and Isabella Oliver have a great selection of formalwear for all kinds of occasions. The problem? I'm not a zillionaire, and I'm only gonna wear this thing once or maybe twice. Shabby Apple had a few ok options, but nothing really great and they're still a little on the spendy side.
Anyone have any suggestions? I've still got a little time!

Make yourself useful and...prepare an emergency kit

 Those of you who know me well enough know that I'm a pretty big fan of The Walking Dead. I started reading the comic books when I was pregnant with my daughter, and pretty near went into shock when I found out that AMC was making a TV show some time later. The show is my Sunday night, meaning nothing else exists during Walking Dead season. I've always had a thing for zombies (I wish there was a less creepy way of saying that, but I can't think of one), as they are by nature terrifying, somewhat realistic, and completely unsettling to a girl who read too many horror novels as a kid and horror comics as a grown-up (and no, I didn't reverse that). They also constitute a "real" emergency, one for which it's good to have a plan, and maybe a plan B too.

The kinds of emergencies that generally befall my family usually require staying indoors. Things like hurricanes, blizzards, torrential rainstorms, etc. don't require us to leave our home, since we are in a reasonably secure area. We live in what is technically a "valley" between two mountains, but are at a high enough elevation that flooding is certainly not a concern for us. If our house ever flooded, you could kiss all of NJ goodbye, because it would be under water. The same is not true of all of my neighbors...even a few houses down, they have seen more "50 year floods" in the past few years than I'd care to count, and many of these have caused significant damage. But despite our relative security, we are by no means safe from all disasters, and the house's proximity to a weapons testing area is a constant reminder that something scary and devastating could happen at any moment. 

For quite a while I've been tossing around the idea of making a family emergency kit, just in case. During Hurricane Sandy last year, my family was without power for almost 2 weeks. We though we were prepared, but we had no idea just how unprepared we were for a storm of that magnitude. We learned the hard way, but thankfully, we learned in time to keep ourselves safe, at least. 

Here are some resources to help you to make a basic emergency kit for you and your family:

• http://www.ready.gov/
• The NJ Office of Emergency Management
• 72hours.org

It is pretty much agreed that you'll need a first aid kit, a good supply of non-perishable food (things like peanut butter, granola/protein bars, dried fruits, crackers, etc. are good bets), water (rule of thumb is 1 gallon per person per day...I know because during Sandy, we ran out after a week), flashlights, a radio, extra batteries, cash, matches, a manual can-opener, and toilet paper and sanitation supplies. It's also good to have a complete change of clothes for everyone, bedding, and some activities to keep everyone busy. Some other things you might think to include are basic tools (in case you need to shut off gas or water service), a fire extinguisher, dry shampoo, hand sanitiser, baby wipes, multivitamins, a fire extinguisher, and (gasp!) disposable plates, cups, and silverware. You should have enough of all of these items to last the whole family for THREE WHOLE DAYS, and even longer if you expect the emergency to last longer. Remember to plan for everyone in your family, including pets, infants (formula, diapers, wipes), and the elderly. Include any medications you will need and food for special diets, as well as doctor and insurance company contact information and policy numbers.Think of the things your family uses every day, and plan accordingly. After almost two weeks without power after Sandy, I was SUPER glad to have a battery-powered portable DVD player. Was it strictly necessary? No, but it sure helped pass the time. So after you've covered the necessities, think, what would it be nice to have?

You can also purchase ready-made kits with all the extras at many websites, including the Red Cross Store online. Some are MUCH, MUCH more in-depth than others and include a lot of things that you might not need.  Again, tailor it to your family's needs, and the types of disasters that are likely to befall you and your family (like, we don't need flood-specific items, but we sure do have a lot of power outages, so...).

Here's to hoping you're better-prepared than I've been in the past, and to keeping you and your family safe!

all good intentions...

ah, the Christmas season. time for presents and cookies and carolling and blowing out your knee walking down the stairs with a toddler on your hip. wait what? yup.

on sunday, after two days of 5+ mile runs, i thought i was listening to my body. it said, go and get a few beers and about 2 dozen hot wings at the bar while your parents take stenni to santa brunch. so i did. i took it a little easy because my knee was hurting a little but i figured, hey, double digit pavement runs will do that to you, plus my whole body hurt. so monday morning rolled around and i took jazzercise. then i did the same thing tuesday. then i returned some presents at the mall, bought some new ones, and came home. i pulled down the driveway, took stenni and my bags out of the car, and headed for the house.

and then i walked down the steps.

OUCH! then boom.

and now even though i have to go in to jazzercise to work 2 more days this week, and even though i have presents to wrap and cleaning to do and 7 dozen cookies and 12 chocolate babkas to make and a 7 mile run scheduled for saturday, i'm laid up.

moral of the story: listen to your body. for reals. because if you ignore it, it will screw you.

i'll be back soon with some Christmas-related fun, promise!

dude gifts.

First up: This Awesome, Awesome print from Clint Walkingstick on etsy. I don't know what man wouldn't love it. 

Shopping for guys is hard. When I'm shopping for friends and family who happen to be female, it just seems like the list gets accomplished much more easily. This is partly because I think, well, what would I like as a gift? At the same time, I usually think, oh, she wouldn't like this, I'll just get it for myself instead. And by then I usually realize that it isn't really Christmas shopping anymore if I'm only picking out things that I intend to keep.

So I asked my husband to give me a few pointers on what works, and what totally doesn't, for man-gifting. His general suggestion is that if he liked it as a kid, he'll like it as an adult. Think baseball cards, sports equipment, game boys, candy, comic books, superhero undies. Oh, and also beer, as long as you know what he likes (if not, many shops will help you put together a 6-pack sampler or you can pick out a sampler from a smaller brewery, like Butternuts or Ommegang, or try the craft beer club).

My absolute favorite site for unique gifts for men with particular habits (woodworking, beer, and cycling, to name a few) is uncommon goods. I bought a ton of gifts from there last year, and intend to do the same thing again within the next few days. For my brother-in-law the middle school technology teacher and cyclist, hubs and I got this cool recycled bike tread belt and a neato wooden tie last year. And hubs' cousin, who always has tickets for some game or show or concert, received the ticket stub diary to keep it all straight. The site is well-organized, with gifts organized by recipient gender and interest. They're a little spendy for some things (while i'd love to spend $200 on an accent table shaped like the great state of nj, it's just not going to happen), but definitely have unique gifts you won't find anywhere else, especially if you've got beer drinkers/cocktail lovers on your list; this set of 12 wine cork candles is great for people with a few bottles lying around.

The beef jerky store has a physical location in downtown Las Vegas, but you can order online as well. And what man doesn't love beef jerky? A vegetarian, you say? Well, that's ok too. The website has all kinds of dried fruits, candies, and Asian/Pacific Island specialty foods. I personally love the hot pork jerky, especially on top of takeout pizza, but be warned: it's terrible for you and contains MSG. If that's a dealbreaker, mabye check out what else they've got.

Head lamps are a cool and unexpected gift, and they come in handy for camping, dog-walking, blackouts, attic- and basement-stair climbing, taking the garbage out when you might get mauled by bears, and more. Here's where you don't want to totally cheap out. You can buy a $5 head lamp at a flea market, but don't be surprised when it craps out. Seriously, I bought like 4 separate cheapie ones for the hubs before I figured this out. This one from rei.com is reasonably priced and made by a good company.  You ay want to get one for yourself too. I use mine for peeking into the depths of my closet, and it's a lot more convenient than holding a MagLite in my teeth.

Lots of men like tools, but we women don't always know what they need or what they've already got. That's ok, because even most local hardware stores can issue gift certificates (though I usually end up buying giftcards from Sears or Tractor Supply Co. since they carry almost everything). Mechanic's toolsets and tool storage centers usually go on sale around the holidays and can serve more than one purpose: they help keep your home organized and they also make it so that you can put a bow on a big present that he'll actually use (I hope).

Some men like tech gifts. I can't really help you with that, and I apologize. There are a slew of tablets, TVs, smartphones and Blu-Ray players out there, and I doubt you really need my help when you can just ask the 16-year-old kid at Best Buy. If you want to give a cool place to recharge your smart phone while also listening to music and lighting up the night, try something like this Eton radio, which has a flashlight and cell phone charger and can be powered by crank.

Last but not least, apparel: All men need clothes. Here's where you have to assess how well you know a guy (the hubby says that while clothing is fine for a husband or long-term boyfriend, possibly even your brother or father, it's weird from friend to friend, as are all gifts over $25. He says men just don't do that). If you bought him a sweater would he take it as an insult, as in he's not well-dressed enough? Clothing is also tricky because fit needs to be taken into consideration. If you buy too big or too small, you might send the wrong message and it may or may not be insulting. Trust me on this. My mother-in-law has been buying clothes too big for our entire family, and it has produced some...not nice feelings, especially from my husband (men are sensitive about that, you know). Apparently according to hubs, band t-shirts/hoodies are ok if you know he loves a particular band, but other than that, we ladies should stick to what he calls "the classics" and I call "accessories." Things like hats, gloves, scarves, and suspenders. Yes, really suspenders. When I didn't buy them for my husband last Christmas, he went out and bought them for himself. I had no idea he was serious, but apparently, men do enjoy suspenders.

And for the man who has everything, but nowhere to put it: these lovely reusable Car Talk bags. 

Anything else to add?

I'm linking up today to the Awesome Gifts for Guys link-up party @ Moxie Wife. Check out some of the other blogs there for even more ideas!

there goes the jersey shore

My sister's boyfriend, Neal the Weatherman, who does the Rutgers University WeatherWatcher forecasts on Sunday nights, shared this picture this morning:

So if anyone's concerned about the cast of Jersey Shore, worry not. They've been out of town since filming wrapped in August. Thank God.

The beach, though, looks like it's faring a little worse, since the water's already underneath the boardwalk in some spots!

Everyone in coastal areas, be safe! Head for high ground!

don't bite your friends

sooo...i sing this song to stenni all the time. usually this ends with her saying "i'll bite..." and then listing the people that she'd like to bite. mostly mama. but she never actually does, she seems to know that we are just kidding. either way i thought that this message was getting across.


apparently, biting is not that problem i should be concerned with. at jazzercize today, she pinched two little boys today until she scratched them and drew blood. the babysitter said that it wasn't in a menacing way, she was just pinching their cheeks like old ladies do. so she asked me if we pinch her cheeks at home. we don't. but she's running up and pinching these kids so hard she draws blood by scratching. this is something completely out of left field, and i have no idea where she came up with it. it is obviously unacceptable.

so i had her apologize to the little boys. then when we got to the car i tried to explain to her that pinching is bad because it hurts. she thought it was hilarious. i tried everything i could think of, explaining why we don't pinch, getting angry, trying to reason with her, threatening time outs if it happens again (though this never actually happens. i'm not sure how to do a time out right. she LOVES her time out chair, which doesn't work out so well for me), and what was her response? she walked right up to me and pinched me in the tummy and said "i'll pinch baby!"

so we had a time out. and i clipped her nails, cuz it hurt. but i'm honestly kind of blindsided by this new pinching thing, and new to the world of toddler discipline. hubs says she's just "exuberant," but i think that she's kind of a bruiser from playing with papa and her older cousins so much, and don't know how to get her to be more gentle. this is a message we especially want to drive home before the new baby comes. any suggestions?

i am so not cut out for this new era of toddlerhood!